- You want professional advice about choosing a job. Describe yourself. (education , skills, Motives, way of thinking, dealing with people, personal qualities)
- While looking for a job one is likely to look up to a number of different advertisements. What makes people apply for some jobs and not others? What do they look for when applying for a job? (pay, benefits, work environment etc)
- List and rank the top ten criteria to bear in mind when looking for a job.
- Read a job advertisement and give your impression of the job on offer. Would you apply for it? Why?
Join America’s fastest growing industry. Manager trainee with excellent communication skills needed for entry-level job. Great people skills essential. Must be able to work independently with attention to detail. Light typing required. Competitive salary and company stock provided. We are looking for a few good people. Start today! Look to your future!
NB! There is a magazine in the USA called “Temp Slave” (temp = a worker on temporary contract) which is read by thousands of disaffected temps. To help temps avoid being tricked into applying for poor jobs, “Temp Slave” publishes a dictionary explaining what job ads really mean.
* Look at useful vocabulary
- Entry-level — at the lowest level in a company
- Pyramid scheme — an illegal way of making money, in which people are persuaded to invest money or sell a product and to persuade others to do the same, with the later investors paying money to the earlier investors, until the payment structure collapses and most people lose their money
- Cold call — a phone call made to somebody that you do not know, in order to sell them something
- Psychotic — affecting the mind in a severe way that makes the person lose contact with reality
- Subordinate — a person who has a position with less authority and power than somebody else in an organization
Match each definition to the correct part of the job ad. To do this successfully, you must have a slightly cynical nature!
i.e., Competitive salary provided — With Bangladesh!
THE DEFINITIONS
- It’s Albania’s fastest too – pyramid selling!
- You will be working in our unlit warehouse.
- With Bangladesh!
- Also known in the former Soviet Union as “Gulag” level
- You will be making cold calls for commission.
- You will help train our managers by being a subordinate fool.
- About 186,000 words a minute should be OK.
- To save money, we now hire only a few good people to do the work of the many good people we have just made redundant.
- You will need to wear a clown suit and wave at passing cars.
- Your supervisor is usually drunk. Your desk is in the garage.
- But for the next few weeks, work for us!
- We don’t have time to check people out so don’t blame us if your colleagues are
psychotic.
Write your advertisement for a job. Make it sound true-to-life.
